5 Signs That You Are In A Codependent Relationship
Among all the terminology we handle, we no longer know very well what a codependent relationship is and what it is not. Therefore, it is very important that you know how to differentiate this way in which you may bond with your partner. Do you want to know more about this?
Being an emotionally dependent person is not the same as having a codependent relationship. Although both terms use the word dependent , they do not mean the same thing. That is why today we will delve into the codependency relationship that is quite frequent. So much so that it is sure to be difficult for you to identify it.
What is a codependent relationship?
The Group for the Analysis and Study of Emotional Dependence (GAEDE) explains very clearly what a codependent relationship is. What happens is that people become obsessed and worried about their partner in a relationship between equals.
In a nutshell, and just so you’re clear, a codependent relationship is made up of two people who are emotionally dependent. This is how they also feed back. Therefore, these types of relationships tend to last a long time.
Sometimes people are not emotionally dependent until they are with a partner. This is because they do not know how to relate in a healthy way within such a relationship.
Signs that you are in a codependent relationship
Being in such a relationship, even if it lasts for years, is not ideal. In fact, these types of relationships wear out and end up creating toxic patterns that do not benefit at all.
Fortunately, it is possible to get out of this and learn to bond in a different way. To do this, you should pay attention to all these signs that will alert you that you are in a codependent relationship.
1. You sacrifice to make the other person happy
You must forget that loving someone is sacrificing yourself. These two concepts have nothing to do with each other. If you are going to sacrifice going out with your friends, seeing your family often, taking that course you like or changing your work residence, you are not in a healthy relationship. Remember that you do not stop being an individual person, even if you share your life with someone.
2. You are afraid that the other person will get angry
In popular culture there is a term to refer to this: walking like stepping on eggshells . Is it what happens to you with your partner? If you are always careful not to say something so as not to anger him or you take responsibility for an anger expressed by something you say or do, be careful! You may be in a codependent relationship.
3. You take care of your partner, but you don’t feel cared for
This is something that happens a lot in codependent relationships and nothing seems to be enough for you. Because you sacrifice so much, you ask the same of the other person.
But you know what? He may not want to sacrifice himself or may not be able to reach the sacrifice point that you reach. The way to solve this is to start by taking care of yourself. Afterwards, you can take care of your partner, but with limits.
4. You are afraid that your partner will leave you
There is no signal, everything is fine. But in your mind obsessive thoughts begin to arise that make that fear of being abandoned grow every day. This is not healthy and you will do things for the other person to avoid that imaginary abandonment. You may even decide to break the relationship to immediately chain another one that will be, again, codependent. You have to get out of this.
5. You try to change the other person
It is very possible that you do not realize it, but with your actions you try to change the other person. This is because you control even the slightest bit, since your fear of him leaving you makes you become obsessive.
You want to have everything very well tied, but you get to a toxic point. This is a mistake. As Silvia Congost says: “ you can love without destroying ourselves and without trying to change our partner” .
Relationships should make us happy
Have you felt represented in all these signs? Do you think you can’t live without the other person? Do you think your life is meaningless without it? Relationships of this style are more frequent than you can imagine and they are not healthy.
That is why it is important that you pay attention to the signals in order to find a solution to this type of links. If having a partner is a necessity, we are doing something wrong.
If you are not happy in your relationship or if you are living it with a lot of anxiety, you can seek help. More and more people are relying on psychologists to resolve harmful and toxic links. Love must be happiness, desire and tranquility.
